My life is better when I close my eyes and live inside my head

I need someone to run away, someone to get me out of here, away from everything in this town. I need someone who can help me

I’m a terrible person and I don’t have a single friend cus I fuckin Alienate everyone and I hate everyone else

It annoys me how bad I am at telling people how I feel. Not about myself but about what they mean to me. How in a crowd of people, many of who just deepen my void of apathy. They stick out no matter how far they are. Not because these people I have come well to know or familiar with from an occasional interaction. It is because from the slightest glance these people fill me we something I very much thought I had lost. Emotion. Whether it be a smile or laugh without worries or insecurities or the thought or memory of them that makes me frozen in my foot steps. To care for someone more than your own kin and not be able to tell them how you feel, letting your words become biased and filtered of its purity by the contours of your own obsessions. Being so blind that when presented with the right opportunity the one that you had been hopping for you don’t even realize it on account of your own ignorance. Always wanting to say what’s right and meaning what’s right but never saying or knowing what’s right. Well is truly my biggest flaw…

(Source: trillavanilla, via trillavanilla)